Fakery and respect for one’s self...

This week upon conversations held with a number of people at university, I have decided to delve into discussing fakery. Apologies in advance if I offend anyone. My intention is to get you all thinking and talking NOT to attack anyone’s personal image/style. 

Girls and guys these days are so preoccupied in trying to look a certain way, which I guess is governed by the media and what celebrities look like. It’s all a bit mind boggling to me, perhaps because I’ve never sort of looked up to celebrities, I just think of them as normal human beings and don’t see what the fuss is all about. I mean I respect certain people but that doesn’t mean I want to know what they do in their spare time, who and when they hook up with or be like them. I’ve never really read magazines and quite frankly would much rather read a book than the latest Heat. 

Okay someone famous may wear something nice and you might want it cos it looks good, but copying outfits, make-up, basically the whole look and attitude to life completely, WHY? Surely, you’d want your own style? I don’t understand people who aspire to look like Beyonce with her bum pads or Victoria Beckham with her fake boobs or whoever. It’s so aggravating to see young girls of today growing up so fast desiring to appear like unrealistic images of females. These women need to understand that they hold an important influential role in the lives of many. They live lives where they aren’t burdened with stress and hard work that comes with normal daily life, they don’t have to do chores or have to deal with financial woes. They shop when they are bored, that too with the assistance of a personal shopper to hold bags and a chauffer to drive them to and fro. They have professional make-up artists and hair stylists to ensure that they look good all day, every day. Holidays, fine dining, expensive health care regimes and time are all in abundance to such individuals. This is not reality for most so why compare yourselves to such standards. 

College was like a catwalk, I remember the horror of discovering some girls woke up and took two-three hours getting ready every morning, and I would do anything for an extra 2-3 minutes in bed! Maybe, if I contrast my morning to that you can compare. Wake up at 8, hop in the shower, pull on something clean before grabbing some toast and leaving the house by 8.25, legging it to the bus stop, JUST ABOUT making it before first class at 9. It’s the same at uni, my house mates and peers will vouch for my alarm going off 15minutes before I have to leave, bed hair and arriving at lectures a tad disorientated. I remember once walking into the ladies bathroom in college to wash my hands and basically having to fight my way to the sink because so many girls were stood checking themselves out and fixing their appearances.  It was ridiculous; I swear I heard too many conversations which basically consisted of ‘what shall I wear tomorrow? – No, I wore that last week,’ and ‘oh, I don’t have anything to wear, I need to go shopping.’ [Ironically coming from girls I’d never seen wearing the same outfit twice.] Quite often also, it was simply too damn much, remember less is more with make up, caking yourself in foundation and looking like a hot sticky mess when the sun comes out is not a good look!

Let’s look at the variety of things possibly fake on a ‘sexy’ woman these days, from head to toe: fake hair extensions/weave, permanently straightened hair, hair dye, fake eye lashes, coloured contact lenses, nose job, lip implants, teeth whitening/cosmetic dentistry, botox, face lift, an inch of make up/permanent make up, take tan, boob job/push up bras/chicken fillets, fake nails, liposuction/tummy tuck and finally bum implants/bum pads. That’s a list of the most common things that I can think of off the top of my head, I found a more definitive list of procedures available through my good friend Google if any of you are interested: http://www.imagemagazineonline.com/IMAGEFall08.pdf. Scroll down to pages 70 to 73. Not cool. I remember in my early teens when boob jobs were something new/shocking and were frowned upon by society; now they are so common that no one thinks twice about them and every Tom, Dick and Harry has them. Actually maybe that should read every Jane, Chloe and Katy has them, you know what I mean. I mean personally plastic surgery is a no go area in my eyes unless you have a medical condition/have some kinda major third degree burns or something that is actually preventing you from being normal and getting on with life, that or boob reduction. (I hear all the boys/men complaining but I'm not even gonna defend it.). Not because you are a pre-pubescent 16 year old wanting boobs which are too big for your frame! God made you a certain way, be grateful you have all your limbs and functioning body parts you ungrateful twits!

I once saw this show on telly a while ago where a short East Asian man was considering going through a medical procedure to potentially add a couple of inches to his structure. I’m not being funny but most Chinese men and women are small, that’s just the way it is. The process to make him taller involved BREAKING HIS LEGS and placing something between his shattered skeleton so the bones would essentially grow around the metal I think it was, thereby elongating them. *SHOCK**HORROR* *REVULSION* *DISMAY* *PITY* 

Come on guys and girls, can’t we love ourselves without enhancements?! What is the reason behind hating yourself in your natural state so damn much? Why do you need to change yourself so damn much for you to be happy/confident? Is it about attracting the opposite sex or is it about feeling good about yourself? Cos quite often you claim it’s the latter, but show signs that it’s quite obviously the former you are attempting.

What I also don’t understand is that with all this fakery, why does your mental state change to mush too? Why is it that upon donning some skimpy outfit and a tonne of make up that your attitude and mentality suddenly also changes to that of a ditzy, stupid little girl?! HOW ON EARTH CAN YOU TELL ME THAT YOUR APPEARANCE GIVES YOU CONFIDENCE WHEN YOU’RE NOT ABLE TO BE YOURSELF AND HAVE TO RE-ENACT A BRAINLESS, GIGGLY, NAÏVE GIRL, RATHER THAN THAT CLEVER, SOPHISTICATED, INDEPENDENT WOMAN YOU STRIVE TO BE?! Where is your respect for yourself? Yeah, that’s what I thought, hiding under that hideous mask!

I am actually amused by the fact that guys/girls complain that the opposite sex does not appreciate/respect them and they can’t find that special someone when they come across as a materialistic and self-obsessed individual. Complaints about not being treated right and all that jazz. Clearly, your exterior is attracting the wrong kinds of people, be it the opposite gender or friends. If you want my advice in finding someone special/some solid friends, someone that really loves and values you, here it is: Go out looking your absolute worst, or at least go out looking simple without your boobs hanging out/without rocking your designer gear, and the person that respects you for you, who doesn’t make sleazy jokes with lame ass chat up lines, who can see your beauty is more than skin deep, who is able to hold actual meaningful conversations with you and treats you the way that you deserve, SNAP HIM/HER UP! You have to love yourself for who you are before you can expect someone else to love you. It’s that simple, yet so many people still don’t seem to understand. 

I hear you feminists crying out that women should be able to sell their bodies for sex and be able to move on from partner to partner like the men do. Shut up already. It is not cool. It is DEGRADING. Being a glamour model is not a frikking aspiration, its not empowering, it’s a joke. How on earth can you question where chivalry has disappeared, ain’t no one gonna respect you when they too darn busy drooling! What happened to aging gracefully, what happened to being mature and growing up, more and more women are clutching on to their younger years, giggling away. Well the joke’s on you. Stop trying to stay young for as long as humanely possible, and embrace your body. And what is up with us worshipping Gok Wan, why you gotta look naked when you can look good clothed?! You should leave looking good naked for the bedroom not for national TV! 

So, where do we draw the line, obviously either end is hard to achieve, most people want to put in some ‘effort’ with their appearances but when is it too much eh, what do you think? Guys I want your opinions on what you think about girls who are fake and whether or not you even like it when girls go the extra mile, and girls, I want your opinions on what you deem is a good level of personal beautification. 

-K